August 6th, 2012


Movie Review Part I of III -- JAWS 2




Starring: Roy Scheider, Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton, Joseph Mascolo

Written by: Carl Gottlieb, Howard Sackler

DIR: Jeannot Szwarc

Blurb: The horror is far from over! Four years after the great white shark terrorized the small resort of Amity, unsuspecting vacationers begin disappearing in an too familiar fashion. Only one man knows the truth.

Then some blah-blah about the producer meant to impress you.

My Blurb: JAWS was easily one of the movies that Kindertrauma-ed me, along with the entire populace it seems, right out of the water. Seriously, there were people who couldn't go in swimming pools after they'd seen that movie. I was already leery of the ocean anyway, because I don't like the feeling of water pulling at me... it's a phobia. But, after seeing JAWS, I couldn't go in deeper than my thighs into the lake my grandparents had a trailer on, and I spent the entire time in the water arguing with myself that sharks are not in lakes... and not quite making myself believe that.

So, when JAWS2 was announced I was completely stoked to be terrified - to once again be afraid to approach any large body of water - again.

Then I saw it and, meh, not so much. Which is going to be a theme of this review, I'm sorry to say... "Meh". How did this go so wrong? Let's dive in (HEH! Did you catch what I did there, 'cause... ocean, diving and... WOW, I never win with you people, do I?).

Oh, but I still don't like being in the ocean... or any water that drags at my body... or that I can't see the bottom of. This movie is one of my guilty pleasures, as it isn't good enough to justify the number of times I'll rewatch it. This review has SPOILERS.


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Scene 27: The next morning at the Brody household, there is tension in the air as Martin tells Mike he isn't spending the rest of the summer sailing around the island but is going to get a job... one which Brody has already lined up for him.



Movie Review: JAWS 2, Part II of III

Spoilers are present.

Scene 28: At the lighthouse a bit later, Tina and Eddie are goofing around, while their friends are all hanging out on the beach.

Tina and Eddie find an Orca with huge, apparent bite marks in it.

Commentary: And, yet, despite only being a few dozen yards away from them... no one smelled the thing rotting on the beach. I feel like I must mention, too, that this scene is actually only here as a "take that" to an overblown and ridiculous film (which I haven't decided about buying anyway, yet) called ORCA. In that movie, it opened with a "take that" to JAWS by having the Orca of the title kill a Great White. This is the payback response by the producers. I actually like this scene though, because it gives us an idea that the shark is being a shark... i.e. it isn't just trying to survive on Amity Islanders, which is a nice touch - whatever the actual purpose.

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Scene 58: With the kids, a rainstorm has moved in. Sean is drifting on his overturned refuge. Everyone else is trying to get him to grab the tow rope they're trying to get to him, so they can pull him back to the pile-up and rescue him, but he's in a state of shock and unresponsive to their calls.

Mike's Friend Who Is A Joker finally gets through to him. The rope is tied, Sean is rescued at least temporarily, and Friend is affectionately relieved to have him safe(r) with the rest of them.



Movie Review, Jaws 2; part III of III


Spoilers within.

Scene 59: Cable Junction comes along -- and the skies are cleared again, so the whole thunderstorm deal had no effect on anything. Doug and Larry, Jr. get into a brief scuffle over... I'm not sure what... but this is interrupted by Pray-Girl; since she's been such a background character, you could forgive forgetting she was there as she's had no personality traits until this moment. That makes our other complete blank, Pray-Girl's Boyfriend. Not that it matters.

Commentary: Long, drawn out shot for little gain. I'm praying, too. 'Shark? Are you out there? Please get hungry again... please... I'm begging... please eat them.'

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Why. (NASA Love) [And future message]

The explanation as to why this is so huge to us.

[Obviously, those who are our children won't understand when they're grown.]

NASA could have so easily failed, Children. And, Congress-As-Of-2012 is looking for an excuse to write NASA off as a waste of expenditure, which would have put America back decades. After all of the things we went through. We persevered
through multiple tragedies to make what you take as common-place possible.

Please. Don't let politicians let you believe that this doesn't serve a purpose. Don't let them convince you that this isn't important to mankind. Because, as the preferred demographic gets younger and younger, those who thought they'd be the generation to introduce space colonies and routine space flight to Luna Colony look to you to make this a reality.

And if you buy the 'special interest group' messages, believe me... you'll find The United States of America falling further and further behind to China and India and Japan, and whoever comes to dominance in the future.

This is important. The Voyager probes prove that U.S.A is important to further knowledge. Don't let ideology take this away.

- harsens-rob